I got done with my undergraduate degree in business management(aka BBA) a few days ago and I’ve been thinking ever since about what to do with my life now. Being at this point of life, all my friends would be doing the same. Obviously, this is going to be a huge change in my and your life( assuming you’re also at this point of life where I am) from being drunk all the time, attending lectures high and celebrating everything with booze to taking responsibility on a next level.
When it comes to me, my favorite line for a long time has been “I don’t know” , sometimes I run away from my problems and sometimes I over think about them till my mind gets exhausted. Today, I took a day off and talked to myself about whatever was going on in my life and my head. Surprisingly coming to a conclusion isn’t that hard if I stop my monkey mind from wandering around( sings”chanchal mann ati random” in the background) I want to take a break. A break from all the stress I’ve been putting myself through. Before joining college, my main goal was to get an undergraduate degree-do MBA(obviously, duhh)-gain some experience-start my own business.
Now, I don’t think I want to follow that path anymore. People change and so did I. Change is inevitable, you have to grow with each passing day and if you’re not growing then there is something seriously wrong with you. Ask yourself, are you same person who you were in high school or a few years ago, and if the answer is yes, then you gotta change my friend. I know it’ll be hard to deal with your old friends who will be disappointed that you will no longer bitch with them or bully people how you used to because you became a kind person. You might have to suffer through some tantrums but that’s okay as long as you’re happy with yourself. I was a good student in college who would attend classes religiously and thinks 10 times before bunking a class. At the end am I satisfied with my degree? Did I enjoy learning cost accounting, operational research blah blah? The answer is a big NO. I did not. If you asked me these questions yesterday, I would have probably said Yes, I did. But today when I talked to myself I realized I was just doing something because I didn’t wanted to give up. You see, there are some people who do stuff because they don’t want to fail even if it means sacrificing your happiness, I belong to that category. If I am assigned a task, I will do it even if I am unhappy with it. That is where my problem lies, and everyone else’s.
My good friend recently commented, “sometimes we forget to count the me in our happiness equation and its high time we do it”, which is what opened my mind up. I have posters on my wall saying how much I love myself and me over everyone, but am I really doing it? Am I really cutting myself some slack and enjoying the moment rather than thinking about 100 other things? I don’t think so.
So, my friends and readers, I have decided that I am going to give myself some time. Because I am truly messed up with confusion, there’s only one thing I am certain about right now is that I want to travel.
I want to travel as much as I can, meet strangers and turn them into friends, have experiences looking at majestic sceneries, walk down unknown-unnamed roads, eat food which are out of my comfort zone, write a lot, unlearn and learn, work on projects I am passionate about, be a better person who is kind to everyone and anyone who comes along my way, be more open to and about myself, and most importantly live in the moment. Honestly, nothing is permanent. Neither the good times nor the bad times, everything passes by quickly, so why not enjoy them? My main goal is to make others happy and to remind them how special each and everyone is, inspire them to create and never put anyone or yourself down, I was in a very bad place where I hated myself and I had no one to share my emotions with, I don’t want anyone to go through what I went through and hence I will do my best to lift others up.
I am aware of the fact that after a few months, some of my friends will appear in my timeline who will be working with branded companies, getting loads of money, and that might make me judge my decision wondering I could have gotten that job. I am ready to deal with it, that is future Swag’s problem, not mine. Right now at this point, I want a break and concentrate on my blog because there are some people along with me who care about it. I would love for everyone to experience what I experience and live them.
Oh, and if you see me with a job after a few months, don’t judge, I am sure I would be doing something I love. From today, it’s my happiness with everyone else’s.
For everyone who made through this long post, thank you, karma will do good to you(hehe). Go and do the same thing which I did, take a day off, be with yourself, talk and feel whatever you’re going through. It helps a lot.
Love and hugs!